FIRST LOVE

I still remember the first day we met
I’ve never needed anyone but
I found myself needing you
And on purpose, I chose you
I chose you out of everyone else
The truth is, being with you was the only time I was happy
Even though I was scared that you may eventually leave me
I still wanted you in my life
I would take every risk to be with you
Falling for you wasn’t falling at all
It was walking into a house
And suddenly know you are home
Being with you made me feel like everything was ok again.

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ARTBROKEN

I may not have loved you first but I loved you the most
Yeah it does hurt to know you lost interest in me
Kind like of someone punching me in the face
I keep waiting for a sign or something from you
But I should accept that sometimes, no message is also a message

One day you’ll remember the girl who loved you so much
That she forgot to love herself
You’ll remember her when you wake up, eat, sleep
She will be your greatest nightmare
You lost the girl who did everything for you
You lost her because of your ego
You lost a girl who stood by your side
Even when you threw harsh words on her
You lost the girl who tried to understand you when she needed you and you were not there.

You’ll realize that she was the one for you
The girl who stood by your side eventhough you don’t appreciate her
The girl you chose to let go because you are full of pride

CRAZY LOVE

I like how sleeping next to someone
Means more than sex sometimes
The body’s way of saying I trust you
To be by my side at my most vulnerable time
You have no defenses when you are asleep
You tell no lies

I just want a boy who touches me distractedly
Like sitting watching a movie
And he just kind of drags his fingers over my skin
While watching and he doesn’t have a motive
He’s not trying to tickle me or be sexual
He’s just touching my skin
And feeling the she shape of my bones under my skin
Like it’s comforting for him to know that am right there under his fingerprints.

And when I say I love you more,
I don’t mean I love you more than you love me
I mean I love you more than the bad days ahead of us
I love you more than any fight we will ever have
I love you more than the distance between us
I love you more than any obstacles that will try to come between us
I love you the most.

POOR BEAR

For as long as I can remember, I’ve always had this void in my life

This empty feeling deep deep inside of me, that you can’t quite shape no matter how hard you try

I remember once we were as close as our own skin, maybe even closer

I liked your eyes watching me

Mentally you punish me
Emotionally you scare me
And now all that’s left of me you want to control

You tell me that you are there for me
But then you continuously pull away
These selfish actions hurt me more than you know
It’s your love I’ve always desired
It’s your kiss I’ve always wanted
It’s your warm hug I’ve always longed for
Your touch can put out my fire
But it’s your love that causes my pain

Would it kill you to acknowledge me?
To take time to take care of me?
If you look deep inside of me you’ll see my pain
Acknowledge that you’ve damaged me
Apologise and realise it’s not always about you

I remember darkness there is a deep desire to sleep, to sleep away and finally forget that there is a quiet forest stronger than hurting, brighter than the sun embracing me

It’s not you, I see it now

It’s life

I want to live my life .

 

AFFLICTION

Screenshot_2018-11-18-19-18-43-1.pngThere is a girl in a corner just turned 19,

Kissing teenage hood bye

Ever since she was small aviation has always been her dream

To fly and explore the world

With loving best friends

For the rest of her life

But as she grew up

Her friends all grew cold

So she twisted her life

Just to fit in their mould

Now her biggest fear

Is that she’ll be rejected

She’ll try anything to feel loved and accepted

She posts photos on Instagram

Hoping that somehow her body attracts

What her heart can’t somehow

Desperate for anyone to think that she’s hot

But the love that she craves has never come through

And all the dreams she once held just haven’t come true

Now she’s sleeping around hoping love will be found

But her heart lies empty from the sorrows she’s drowned

But deep down

She knows that she is not bold

She tries to fit herself into spaces created for cubicles and happy hours

But her soul spills over the side and she’s left apologising for boxes she can’t fit

For all  it takes is a beautiful fake smile

To hide an injured soul

And they’ll never notice how broken you really are

THE ONE

 

 

silhouette of man touching woman against sunset sky
Photo by Pixabay on Pexels.com

You are a dream I have always longed to dream

A wish that is yet to be fulfilled

A prayer to Heaven that is yet to be heard and headed

 

Yes you are a dream, the objet of passion and thoughts repressed

A flame reducing both my  heat and soul to amber glowing deam

You truly are my dream the very thought of my mind when it falls to sweet oblirion

The cause of my happiness,  the reason of my sorrow.

I’ll always love you , I’ll  love you for ever.

LUST LOVE

IMG-20181111-WA0005Am a little purple flower

A nerd or so he must be

Took a picture of me and told me how much he loved me

The word love dangled up my mind since it came from the opposite sex

I gave him everything and still it wasn’t enough.

It was never enough.

He made me feel like I was nothing

Made me believe that I was difficult to love

Like a fool I kept on trying to please him

I kept trying till it became too much

I knew it didn’t feel right

But no matter  how bad things got

I kept on trying

I told myself it would be different this time

I would treat myself like nothing

Yet to you , I gave so much

Then you go and break my heart

Telling me that you’re sorry and that this is a fresh start

And like a fool I believed you .